Blind Spots

The first two months here have been difficult to say the least. Katie spent a week in the hospital and still needs a couple more tests. We are in a new country, learning a new language, and meeting new people. Maybe one of the greatest challenges is being a parent during this whole process.

We have had ups and downs of language. At first, Hannah did not like her school. They only spoke to her in Spanish and she knew only English. She finally started catching on and has now surpassed us! Just this last weekend she was not being obedient at all. In order to get her to come I had to speak in Spanish, “Venga aqui!” When I told her to “come here” she came immediately.

It has been a little different as we navigate Costa Rican sicknesses. She had a virus. It was similar to viruses in the US but it was stronger and lasted longer. She had a fever for a week and a three day rash followed. She now has a lingering cough. Other kids have been sick with other things and I’m praying it passes without another trip to the doctor.

What has been most difficult here is my hidden blind spots. Well, that was being too positive. This has challenged my prayer life and my faith like nothing before. Over the past two months as we have went from one difficulty to another, I have prayed like the man in the Bible whose child needed to be healed by Jesus. Jesus told the man all things were possible for the one who believes. In a moment where the depths of his soul were peered into by the Lord, he prayed, “I believe, help my unbelief” (Mk 9:24).

I don’t know what it is but when someone you love is sick it is bad. But it seems when your child is sick it is the worst thing ever. My reference point for sicknesses in Costa Rica has been things at a week-long interval. It seems that with each day there is a new depth of my heart that is being exposed and revealed. When NASA released pictures form the Hubble telescope everyone (including myself) was amazed at seeing the deepest pictures of space. I feel like those pictures are a Polaroid compared to intense gaze of the Lord upon my heart. So I pray, “I believe, help my unbelief.”  

Has God failed?

Has God failed?

Hannah woke up this morning with a cough. Today, it was a little more pronounced than yesterday. So yet again, we are missing another day of school to keep her home. Katie is feeling much better so we are alternating during the day. What gets me about Hannah being sick is that Katie and I have prayed for her to be well and not get sick. She is sick. Has God failed?

In one sense, yes. God has failed. He just hasn’t failed as you may think of it. God has not failed to be good, righteous, just, loving, or sovereign. In other words, he has not stopped being God. But he has failed to be a get well genie for us.

Two years ago, John Piper said, “God is always doing 10,000 in your life, and you may be aware of three of them.” Ouch! So Hannah is sick. I am not sure why she is sick. I would love her to never get sick, ever. What I don’t know is what God knows. He knows each virus and bacteria she will face in her life. He knows that for her to have a strong immune system later she has to have these little coughs and sicknesses. Sicknesses build immune system strength.

I’m staying at home first. We will probably take her to the doctor tomorrow. We will have extra tea parties. She will take an extra nap. I will continue to pray she gets well but in my prayers I will pray to God who is always good, always righteous, always, just, always loving, always sovereign, and has seen his own Son in far worse shape than my daughter with a cough. 

Katie is finally home. She spent the last week in the hospital fighting a pretty serious dose of the Noro virus. We had people praying for us all over the globe. We both felt completely overwhelmed with the grace and peace that is only offered in Jesus. While spending a week in the hospital is bad, It is worse when it is in another country. When you don’t know the language, well it seems worse. The problem is only heightened when you have a twenty month old child that needs to be quarantined from her mother. Since Katie had two IVs, one in each wrist, she required my constant presence so I was unable to spend much time with Hannah throughout the week.

However, even though the situation sounds bad, I wanted to share with you how the Lord tenderly loved us through the ordeal. He is so faithful and loving. He did several things with perfect timing that reminded us of his care and provision.

Initially, we had planned on spending Saturday at La Paz waterfall and zoo. It is (I know from pictures of friends) a beautiful tropical zoo paradise about an hour and a half away from San Jose, CR. There were about forty students set to go on the excursion which the language school set up for us. We were so excited. I had the Go-Pro camera charged, bags packed, and we were set. After several weeks of seeing the city of San Jose both Katie and I felt we needed to see something pretty. Not that the city isn’t nice but it is the capital city. Everything changed about 3am. I woke up with severe stomach cramps and everything that went with it, I thought, La Paz may not happen. When I woke up two hours later throwing up, I thanked the Lord for bringing on the sickness an hour before we were set to leave for La Paz. I don’t have anything against the other students but I feel some things are best not shared!

Katie was so sweet and kind. She took missing La Paz like a trooper. She cared for me. She got Gatorade for me and even washed all the vegetables from the market. I laid in bed feeling horrible but cared for. At noon, Katie came in the room and said she wasn’t feeling the best. Two hours later, she was in full on sick mode. We asked our neighbors to watch Hannah and Katie and I laid in bed sick as dogs. At about 5pm, it was apparent Katie was not getting better.

The school has a doctor (Dr. Longworth) who keeps office hours at the school and at the best hospital in CR. His parents were missionaries here. He was born here but speaks perfect English. I spoke with him on the phone and he advised us to go to the ER. So we took our first solo taxi ride (first ride without someone speaking for us) and we drove to the ER. Dr. Longworth called ahead to the ER for us and within ten minutes Katie was seen, had blood drawn, and IV fluids had begun. She was still sick but in the right place.

The blood work came back and showed she had an infection and was dehydrated. After several hours, the ER doctor (who also spoke very good English) gave us his business card with his personal contact information on it, a host of medications, and set us on our way. When you go to check out of the hospital, they offer to fill your prescriptions at the pharmacy. Typically, the meds are a little bit more expensive but the convenience factor makes it completely worth it. While we were waiting for the scripts to get filled, the ER doctor called me back in and told me he called Dr. Longworth and that he wanted Katie admitted into the hospital. He said, “I do not know Dr. Longworth. My normal protocol for this type of sickness is to release you with these medicines.” So I was stuck deciding between two doctors opinions. After conferring with Katie, who still didn’t feel the best, I told him to admit her. If it were me, I would have probably gone home but since it was Katie I wanted to make sure she was ok.

We had to wait longer to get Katie to a room. We finally did around midnight. When we entered into the room, the nurses began checking her vitals. I asked one of them to take my temperature. I had a 100.5 degree fever. I didn’t feel good so I checked myself into the ER and had my blood drawn. While waiting for my results, I took a bag of IV fluids. My numbers came back showing I was fighting something but nothing to the same level of Katie. I was released with no medications. After a bag of fluids, I felt much better.

I got to Katie’s room about 2:30am. She had been throwing up or at least attempting to the entire time I was gone. I was so thankful for Dr. Longworth and giving us the wisdom to follow his advice over the other doctor.

It took a couple of days for Katie to feel better. We were hopeful she was going to be coming home on Tuesday. She was trying so hard to get released. The doctors gave her two goals: drink liquid and eat food. When she could do both and keep them down she would be able to go home. Well Monday night, she had an appetite. She ate some food and drank some Powerade. I went home preparing to come get her for discharge. She sent me a message early in the morning, she couldn’t keep anything down. On top of that, she had severe pain in her abdomen.

It was the grace of God for her to stay those extra days. During the extra days, the doctors found that fluid had formed around her bowel and in her lungs due to the severity of the sickness. They were also able to determine she had the Noro virus and not a bacterial infection as was initially expected. This discovery completely changed her medication. The medications and lack of antibiotic helped her be able to repair the damage done to her stomach and esophagus.

While we were there, the nurses were so kind. The doctors all seven of them were great. Dr. Longworth is known for being thorough. He made rounds at least one a day. He had another doctor come by twice a day, an infectious disease doctor, gastro doctor, surgeon, and a couple of doctors who ran tests. Here doctors run ultrasounds not techs. It is great because they give instant readings and diagnosis. Katie got several tests and each one was administered by a doctor with an attending nurse. Katie was in great care. I told her it was an all-inclusive stay. She was able to order anything she wanted, had people make her bed twice a day. Costa Ricans are very serious about showering in the morning and changing sheets. She had her sheets changed and turned down twice a day. Needless to say, she saw my statement as a joke. Oh they also serve a Hershey’s Kiss whenever you order a cup of coffee. I see the last point as a total positive thing for coffee shops in the US to adopt. 

While we were there, we had visitors from the school staff, a teacher, and plenty of students. We couldn’t have felt more loved by their visits. To top things off, some of the students have set meals up for us now that we are home.

Several of the hard things that happened to us. First, Katie got admitted to the hospital. But can you imagine if she wasn’t? What a mark of God’s kindness having her admitted! Second, Katie couldn’t keep food down on Monday. Keeping her several more days allowed the doctors to find out exactly what was wrong with her which kept her medicine count down. Now that she has been home and recovered, we could not be more pleased with her care. The last couple of days of her hospitalization allowed the doctors to do several different tests which completely changed the medication she was given. This medication change allowed her to return home and recover much quicker. So while we may not always know God’s plan or his timing, his plan is always good and he is always on time.